On second thought, just give John Fox a try.
John Boyett, a Broncos practice-squad safety, made the mistake of telling Denver Police to “contact my boss, John Elway” while they were arresting him for public intoxication and other obnoxious acts.
“Make that ‘former boss,’” pointed out Janice Hough of LeftCoastSportsBabe.com. “The Broncos cut him.”
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• At SportsPickle.com: “Report: Some Giants players think Eli Manning acts too white.”
• At TheOnion.com: “Jets amazed by Percy Harvin’s willingness to fight in huddle.”
According to Lifespan.com, lack of exercise, improper diet, poor sleeping habits and stress are among the leading causes of depression.
Somehow not making the list: being a Cubs fan.
You call this progress?
So, there’s a report that some unnamed Seahawks think Russell Wilson isn’t “black enough”?
Back in the mid-Seventies, when Warren Moon was quarterbacking the University of Washington to the Rose Bowl, some critics in town complained that the QB wasn’t “white enough.”
We’ve come a long way, baby — or have we?
Just had to ask
“Rhetorical question of the week,” wrote Jack Finarelli of SportsCurmudgeon.com. “Where else but in intercollegiate athletics could Idaho be in the Sun Belt Conference?”
Talk about a shorts stop.
Federal agents raided a Kansas City lingerie shop that was selling unlicensed World Series drawers with a Royals logo and the words “Take the Crown” stitched across the back.
• Gregg Drinnan of BlogSpot.com, on TV pundits who refer to the NBA as “The Association”: “There is only one Association and they sang ‘Windy.’ Feel free to Google it, OK?”
• Dom DeBonis, 81, to the Golf Channel, on the secret to hitting a hole-in-one for three straight days: “Be lucky.”
• Bears QB Jay Cutler, to ChicagoBears.com, when asked if his team prepares any differently for a home game than one on the road: “We don’t get on a plane.”
Watch your back
Luis Suarez — banned for four months after biting an opposing player during the World Cup — finally made his debut for Barcelona on Saturday.
It’s probably no exaggeration to say he’s been champing at the bit.
Dwight Perry: 206-464-8250 or email@example.com