Might be time to invest in a cat.

The Nottingham Caesars, a British football team, had to postpone their season opener because mice got into the equipment in the offseason and chewed up the team’s gameday jerseys, pants, pads and helmets. The Caesars opened with a “mish mash” of old uniforms before finally securing replacement stuff.

“We will be taking precautions with our storage in the future — we won’t be storing things in boxes on the ground again,” coach Vanden Warner told the BBC.


• At TheBeaverton.com: “Stanley Cup Playoffs Participant banner raised again at (Toronto’s) Scotia Bank Centre.”

• At Fark.com: “Nike to Kyrie Irving: Just do it … with another shoe company.”

Paging Boss Hogg

Junior-college QB or a bit player on TV’s “Dukes of Hazzard?”

Oklahoma’s football team just got a commitment from a guy named General Booty.


Sun block

The Event Horizon Telescope has captured a historic first image of Sagittarius A*, the supermassive black hole at the center of the Milky Way.

But still no sign of the Suns from Game 7.

Coach 12,500K

Former Duke basketball coach Mike Krzyzewski was paid nearly $3.3 million in base salary, $2 million in bonus pay and just over $7.2 million in other reportable compensation in 2020, according to the university’s federal tax returns.

Looks like he’s perfected his bank shot.

Wrong Steeler

The Royals fired hitting coach Terry Bradshaw.

Hey, if they wanted hard hitting, why didn’t they hire Jack Lambert or Mean Joe Greene?

Welcome to Atlanta

When Dallas eclipsed the Suns, it marked the fifth time that a team with Chris Paul on it has blown a 2-0 postseason lead — an NBA record.

On the bright side, he’s been named an honorary Atlanta Falcon.

AARP champion

Rasslin’ legend Ric Flair, 73, will come out of an 11-year hiatus to wrestle what he says will be his final match on July 31 in Nashville.


Spoiler alert: He’ll win a title belt cinched up to his armpits.

Caught stealing

The Yankees cut outfielder Jake Sanford — a 2019 third-round pick — for allegedly pilfering equipment from his minor-league teammates and selling it online, the Newark (New Jersey) Star-Ledger reported.

That’s one way to lead the league in steals.

Touchdowns, anyone?

Iowa used a 28-3 closing run to beat Indiana, 30-16 — in baseball.

Or more than the Hawkeyes’ football team scored in 10 of their 14 games last season.

Gopher broke

Red Sox pitcher Nathan Eovaldi became just the third pitcher in MLB history to allow five home runs in one inning.

When’s Eovaldi Neck Brace Night?

Talking the talk

• Field Yates of ESPN, via Twitter, after Alabama coach Nick Saban accused Texas A&M of buying all its recruits: “The Texas A&M-Alabama football game has officially been rescheduled for this Saturday at 3:30 PM ET.”


• Vancouver Giants coach Michael Dyck, to Kamloops This Week, on why he wouldn’t criticize the officiating after a 4-2 WHL playoff loss: “With the price of gas these days, I can’t waste money on fines.”

Double trouble

Former Bears RB Tarik Cohen, who hasn’t played in the NFL since he tore his ACL in Week 3 of the 2020 season, has now ruptured his Achilles.

“Been there, done that,” said Klay Thompson.

Quote marks

• Giants receiver Darius Slayton, via Twitter, on the scariest curse in sports history: “Dating a Khardashian.”

• RJ Currie of SportsDeke.com, after the New York Post questioned why the NFL so often fails to address “crass, uncouth social-media behaviour” by players: “I’m thinking we can rule out lack of evidence.”

• At Fark.com, on Steph Curry completing his degree 13 years after leaving Davidson: “Hopefully, he can find work now that he graduated.”

Red-light district

The Calgary Flames beat the Edmonton Oilers 9-6 in Game 1 of the Western Conference semifinals.


They scheduled a hockey game, and a track meet broke out.

Quote, end quote

• Mike Lupica of the New York Daily News, on Tom Brady’s 10-year, $375M TV contract awaiting when he retires: “I really was genuinely happy for Touchdown Tom, though, when I heard about the Fox deal. Finally, the guy catches a break.”

• Janice Hough of LeftCoastSportsBabe.com, on all the blowouts in the NBA playoffs: “All the drama of the Harlem Globetrotters vs. the Washington Generals.”