So, just how savvy was Philip Rivers? Let JJ Watt tell you.
“I’ll never forget lining up for a play,” tweeted the Texans defensive star of the just-retired QB, “and Phil pointing to one of our linebackers and telling him he was lined up wrong based off the blitz we were about to run and being 100% correct about it haha.”
• At Fark.com: “Mark Davis takes all that money he’s saved on haircuts and buys a WNBA team.”
• At TheOnion.com: “Man ice skating for first time really getting hang of clutching wall.”
Yogi Berra, the late Yankees legend, is about to get his own commemorative postage stamp.
New U.S. Postal Service motto: It ain’t delivered till it’s delivered.
RIP, Hank Aaron
And a tip of the baseball cap to Hammerin’ Hank Aaron, who passed away at age 86 on Friday and whose average output in 21 seasons as a Brave — .310 average, 35 homers, 105 RBI — would be the envy of 99.9% of big-league hitters.
“Throwing a fastball by Henry Aaron,” opposing pitcher Curt Simmons once famously said, “is like trying to sneak the sun past a rooster.”
“Feherty” — David Feherty’s talk show — is not being renewed by the Golf Channel, ending its 10-year run.
Which certainly puts a whole new spin on “taking a drop.”
A man lived at Chicago’s O’Hare Airport undetected for three months before he finally got caught.
Turns out it was just ex-Cubs hurler Yu Darvish waiting for his trade to finally go through.
Nearly four dozen tennis players who flew in for next month’s Australian Open have been placed in a strict 14-day hotel quarantine — they can’t even practice — because of three positive tests on their flights.
For those of you scoring at home, it’s love-47.
Hogging the Heisman
Let this sink in: Alabama players finished 1-3-5 in the 2020 Heisman Trophy balloting and the winner — DeVonta Smith — wasn’t even considered the Tide’s No. 1 receiver back when the season started.
Talking the talk
• Comedy writer Alex Kaseberg, via Twitter, on the NFC playoff matchup featuring quarterbacks Tom Brady, 43, and Drew Brees, 42: “Not to say Brees and Brady are old, but when they call out audibles they yell ‘Matlock’ … ‘Murder She Wrote’ …”
• Nets coach Steve Nash, to reporters, on why he’ll manage James Harden’s minutes early on: “We don’t want to run the batteries down on our new Christmas present this early.”
• Nick Canepa of the San Diego Union-Tribune, on rumblings that the NFL combine might be canceled, or split up: “So Trevor Lawrence may not broad jump, and go in the second round.”
Don’t hold the lettuce
Recent Tennessee football recruits got handed McDonald’s bags with cash in them when they arrived on campus, NBC’s Dan Patrick reported.
Or as SEC rivals now call it: a good old Rocky drop.
• Brittany Brees, via Instagram, revealing that her QB husband Drew played this season for the Saints with a torn rotator cuff, a torn fascia in his foot, 11 broken ribs and a collapsed lung. “Yet you did not complain once. … Makes me think I should not have taken the epidural while giving birth to the kids!”
• Janice Hough of LeftCoastSportsBabe.com, on Brees playing through a litany of injuries: “Just in case you were feeling too tired or old to get off the couch today.”
• Blogger Chad Picasner, on Urban Meyer taking the Jaguars’ head-coaching job after twice quitting college gigs for health reasons: “Of course, the best treatment for that is money. … I’m sure he feels better already.”
• Mike Hart of the Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel, after trash-talking Rams cornerback Jalen Ramsey and Packers wideout Davante Adams got into some pregame chirping before their NFC playoff game: “Ramsey, of course, has never been diagnosed with lockjaw.”
• Comedy writer Brad Dickson, via Twitter, on Nebraska’s drop in per capita COVID vaccinations — from third to 15th to 29th and now 34th: “This is beginning to feel like Husker football.”
Links to the past
Technology? They don’t need no stinking technology.
“Thanks to GPS, they can identify the location of your phone within one inch of anywhere on the planet,” noted comedy writer Alex Kaseberg. “But the NFL still measures first downs with two sticks and a chain.”
Quote, end quote
• Mike Bianchi of the Orlando (Fla.) Sentinel, on Don Sutton’s legacy: “Just a friendly reminder to all of the baseball pitchers of today who skip starts because they might have a strained cuticle on their pinkie and for all the NBA players who sit out games because of load management, Sutton was never on the injured list and never missed a turn in the rotation in 756 big-league starts over 23 seasons.”
• Phil Mushnick of the New York Post, with a suggested prop bet for the NFL conference-title games: “Which playoff telecast will include the loudest fake crowd noise?”
• RJ Currie of SportsDeke.com, on the NFC playoff matchup that featured QBs Tom Brady, 43, and Drew Brees, 42: “The winner (got) to tell the loser to get off his lawn.”
• Bob Molinaro in the Norfolk Virginian-Pilot, after new Texas football coach Steve Sarkisian hired a special-teams coach for $1 million a year: “But remember, there’s never enough money for the athletes.”
Correction: This story has been updated to reflect that Tom Brady and Drew Brees faced off in an NFC playoff game, not AFC as originally reported.