Floyd Mayweather says he’d be willing to come out of retirement to fight Conor McGregor again — but only for, say, “an easy $300 million.”
Which just goes to show that Floyd — in finance as well as pugilism — remains a big fan of the must-score system.
• At Fark.com: “Patrick Mahomes and Brittany Matthews are expecting their first child. Alabama has already offered a full-ride scholarship.”
• At TheOnion.com: “Punter likes to pretend coach’s pregame speech meant for him too.”
Another Twin killing
Minnesota got eliminated by the Astros on Wednesday, 3-1 — the Twins’ record 18th consecutive playoff loss.
In fact, the Twins have been swept so often they’ve been named an honorary curling sheet.
Put it on the list
Just not their night
The Yankees — for the first time in their 120-year history — hit into five double plays and committed four errors in the same game in a 4-3, 10-inning loss to the Marlins.
Or as the 1962 Mets used to call such an occurrence, Friday.
Penalty on the play
The NFL is investigating yet another alleged COVID-19 protocol violation by the Raiders, this one for allowing unauthorized locker-room access.
Judging by the coaches’ mask fines, this could be one costly encroachment penalty.
The Cubs’ Willson Contreras pinwheeled his bat high in the air after hitting a three-run homer against the White Sox, then got drilled in the back his next time up.
Adding further insult, bench-jockeys are now referring to Contreras as Flip Willson.
This is so 2020
The Georgia State-Charlotte football game Sept. 26 was postponed because of players’ positive COVID-19 tests — incorrectly postponed, as it turned out, because the test results were also interpreted incorrectly.
And you thought only quarterbacks make bad reads in football?
Talking the talk
• Jaguars QB Gardner Minshew, to ThePlayersTribune.com, on his critics: “Vincent Van Gogh, people told him, ‘You can’t be a great painter, you only have one ear.’ You know what he said? ‘I can’t hear you.’ ”
• Times sportswriter Bob Condotta, via Twitter, on the Chiefs’ tackle-eligible TD vs. the Ravens: “Knew I should have started Eric Fisher at receiver this week.”
• Mississippi State football coach Mike Leach, to CBS, on why his team had to open the season at No. 6 LSU: “Because New England, Green Bay and the Chiefs already had somebody scheduled.”
Getting the birds
Those five foul-mouthed parrots — removed from public view at Lincolnshire Wildlife Park in eastern England after they started swearing at customers — have been returned, hopefully reformed.
Though keepers had to think twice about bringing back the one named Earl Weaver.
Baseball, Ray, baseball
• Iowa Cubs broadcaster Alex Cohen, via Twitter, on a record eight MLB playoff games last Wednesday: “I have now been watching baseball for 12 straight hours. I’ve been eating nothing but string cheese and pretzels. My eyes hurt, and I may or may not have a mild migraine. Couldn’t be happier.”
• Retired baseball writer Jim Street, via Facebook, on the only thing more shocking than the Marlins making the NL playoffs: “They also tied for the MLB lead in home attendance.”
• The late MLB outfielder Jay Johnstone, who died of COVID-19 at age 74: “When there’s no game, Philly fans go to the airport to boo bad landings.”
• Janice Hough of LeftCoastSportsBabe.com, after Yankees and Indians pitchers tied a playoff record by issuing 19 walks: “And how many of us who used to be youth baseball parents had painful Little League flashbacks?”
The NFL hit coaches with $100,000 fines for mask noncompliance on the sideline in Week 2 games, then threatened teams with “suspensions and/or forfeiture of draft picks” after Week 3.
So what do they do next to ramp up the punishments — double-secret probation?
• Jack Finarelli of SportsCurmudgeon.com, no fan of “Undisputed” and other such shows built on nonstop disagreements: “If I found that sort of thing interesting, I would plop myself down in the gallery of the U.S. Senate every day and listen to the august members of that organization speak past one another.”
• Comedy writer Brad Dickson, via Twitter, after Franklin (Neb.) High School’s football team beat Elba 60-6: “The Elba coach said his players could’ve come back from such a deficit, if only they were playing the Atlanta Falcons.”
• Nick Canepa of the San Diego Union-Tribune, after the 2020 American Fitness Index rated San Diego the 11th-fittest American city: “I’m thankful they didn’t go house-to-house.”
• Blogger Patti Dawn Swansson, on NASCAR fining Hendrick Motorsports $100,000 for excessive wind-tunnel testing: “Curt Menefee can relate. He has to sit beside Terry Bradshaw for five hours every weekend on ‘Fox NFL Sunday’.”
Hit and Miss
• Florida’s Dan Mullen, to ESPN, on the improving reception he gets from football fans at Ole Miss, where he previously coached: “Usually they tell me I’m No. 1 when I come in, but now they’ve used all five fingers to wave at me.”
• Ravens QB Lamar Jackson, to reporters, after losing to the Chiefs for the third straight year: “Our kryptonite.”
• Samantha Previte of The New York Post, on fantasy football: “Even if you’re staring down a dismal 0-3 record, if the 2020 season has taught us anything, it’s that a comeback is always possible (see: teams playing the Falcons).”
• Syndicated columnist Norman Chad: “I just kissed my sister — who does not follow the NFL — and amazingly, she said, ‘The Eagles and the Bengals tied?’ ”