The Astros’ Alex Bregman — looking to change his luck last Sunday — sheared off his mustache between at-bats in an 11-3 win over the Royals.

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Ever hear of a third baseman in a shave situation?

The Astros’ Alex Bregman — looking to change his luck last Sunday — sheared off his mustache between at-bats in an 11-3 win over the Royals.

“I had no idea,” teammate Gerrit Cole told “I thought it played. It was Jeff Kent-esque. … Personally, I’m a fan of the ’stache, but I guess it’s been sent down. It’s been DFA’d. We’ll wait until it comes back.”

On the road again

Right-hander Edwin Jackson has joined his 13th major-league team — the Oakland Athletics — matching former reliever Octavio Dotel’s MLB record.

Well, that’s one way to get a lot of movement on your fastball.

Dive bar

Sir Walter Pub, a bar in Rio de Janeiro, promised its customers a free drink last Wednesday every time Brazilian star Neymar took a dive against Serbia in their World Cup match.

Here’s hoping the patrons had their designated drivers lined up.

Single Digits Dept.

Hall of Famer Bill Russell gave presenter Charles Barkley the finger during Monday’s NBA Awards telecast.

Or as hoops apologists preferred to spin it, he took a bird exception.

Circle the date

Seattle is the fifth-best city in America in which to celebrate the Fourth of July, according to, but try telling that to Major League Baseball.

When the Mariners host the Angels this year, it will be just their fifth home game on Independence Day in 25 years — and only their 12th in 39 seasons overall.

Mulligan, please

Here’s one golfer with an unfortunate surname: Canada’s Ryan Yip.

And the ref is history

Our favorite referee, Gene Steratore, shockingly announced his retirement after 15 NFL seasons to become a CBS analyst.

The choice between CBS and Fox was so close, insiders say, that Gene had to pull out a card again.

It’s wiener-take-all

The Milwaukee Brewers have secured new sponsorship with Johnsonville, ensuring that their famous racing sausages will continue beyond this season.

To appease the kid demographic, how about adding a couple of little brats?

St. Jetersburg North

Derek Jeter has put the 115-year-old Tiedemann Castle — his residence on Greenwood Lake, N.Y., during his Yankee playing days — on the market for $14.75 million.

It features a 12,590-square-foot home, six bedrooms, 12 bathrooms, one pool, one lagoon and one replica of the Statue of Liberty but, alas, no gift baskets.

Better squint

University of Michigan researchers have designed a computer that is smaller than a grain of rice.

The screen is so tiny, we hear, that even the Orioles’ playoff chances won’t fit on it.

Talking the talk

• Steve Klauke, via Twitter, on Cuban baseball hotshot Victor Victor: “His walk-up song should be the U of Michigan’s fight song.”

• Comedian Argus Hamilton, on the NBA draft: “Or as the Kardashians call it, Tinder.”

Lighting it up

Ayesha Curry, wife of the Warriors’ Steph, rang up 194 points in the final round on “Family Feud,” nailing four of the five No. 1 answers.

Hitting buzzer-beaters, it appears, runs in the family.

Sitting-room only

What’s the best sporting use of a table this side of WWE?

Answer: Japan’s 21st annual tea-table flipping tournament — the World Chabudai-Gaeshi — in which sitting contestants let out an angry yell, flip the table and send whatever’s on top flying as far as possible. This year’s winning distance: more than 27 feet.

Paging Jim Gray

LeBron James reportedly doesn’t want a “recruiting circus” with his free agency this time.

Translation: “The Decision II” on ESPN will be just 30 minutes this time.

Ball Day in New York

Mets pitchers yielded seven bases-empty home runs in an 8-7 loss to the Dodgers.

So when is Hope Solo Jersey Night?

Double Digits Dept.

Diego Maradona flipped double birds to the crowd when Argentina scored to break a 1-1 tie against Nigeria, then had to be attended to by medics moments later.

Hand of God, OK. But the finger? Don’t push your luck, pal.

Quote marks

• Cubs manager Joe Maddon, to the Chicago Sun-Times, not panicking after the lowly Reds swept a four-game series: “You still eat. You still sleep. You still pet your puppy and move on.”

• John Shea of the San Francisco Chronicle, on all the big-name sluggers turning down the Home Run Derby: “What is this, the Slam Dunk Contest?”

• Vagabond pitcher Edwin Jackson, to reporters, on his secret to staying power at age 34: “I try to be young once a week.”

• Comic Torben Rolfsen, on Jackson pitching for his record-tying 13th MLB team: “No one’s bounced around a pro sports league that much since Madonna.”

• New Vikings QB Kirk Cousins, to the Minneapolis Star Tribune, on his first foray into the team’s playbook: “It’s a bit like drinking through a firehose right now.”

• RJ Currie of, on floundering K.C. poised to trim payroll and go into full rebuilding mode: “Call it the Royal weeding.”

• AktanE, via Twitter, on A’s slugger Khris Davis saying he’d want manager Bob Melvin pitching to him if he competed in the Home Run Derby: “He can take any Rangers pitcher and win the whole damn thing.”

Hitting the pay window

If the Orioles’ Chris Davis — batting .155 through 80 games while getting paid $23 million in 2018 — finishes the season on his current pace, it will pencil out to $315,068 per hit.

Shooting 50 percent

Dick’s Sporting Goods stores in the Cleveland area — anticipating the departure of LeBron James — are selling his $110 jerseys for half price.

You can also get a cut-rate deal on a J.R. Smith jersey, but they make you wait till closing time.

Quoth the mavens

• Comedy writer Brad Dickson, via Twitter, after being attacked by a gaggle of hissing geese while walking Nebraska’s Keystone Trail: “I believe this means they’ve read my work.”

• NBC’s Jimmy Fallon, on the minor-league Erie (Pa.) Seawolves selling a hot dog wrapped in a cotton candy bun topped with Nerds candies as part of “Sugar Rush Night”: “And instead of condiments, every one of those comes with a cry for help.”

• Comedy writer Alex Kaseberg, after 63-year-old golfer Greg Norman posed nude in the ESPN Magazine body issue: “The caption under the photo is ‘This should get those punks off my lawn.’ ”

• Janice Hough of, on the Giants’ Beatles-themed postgame fireworks show: “In honor of (pitcher Hunter) Strickland breaking his hand on a door, are they playing ‘Fool on the Hill’?”

• Jim Barach of, on Brett Favre, 48, joining the fight against youth tackle football: “Although, at his age, youth tackle football includes the NFL.”

Paging Andy North

Golfer Bryson DeChambeau used a compass in a tournament, prompting a PGA Tour investigation.

Veteran Tour watchers were stunned — to learn that a man actually thought about checking for directions.