As 15-yard penalties go, this one was small potatoes.
Nevada got socked with an unsportsmanlike-conduct penalty in the waning seconds of the Famous Idaho Potato Bowl when Wolf Pack players dumped a cooler full of french fries on winning coach Jay Norvell — and some of the spud slicings wound up on the field.
Luckily for Norvell it wasn’t the Gator Bowl.
• At @NOTSportsCenter: “BREAKING: The Jets have fired Adam Gase for violating team rules by actually winning a game.”
• At Fark.com: “It’s day 2 of the NBA season, annnnnd there’s the first postponement.”
Falling in the poles
Houston’s NBA opener had to be postponed because James Harden paid a maskless visit to a strip club and got himself DQ’d for violating COVID protocols, dropping the Rockets’ roster below the minimum eight players.
It’s believed to be the first time a game was called on account of make-it-rain.
But no truth to the rumor that Harden also jeopardized his position as the quarterback for the Washington Football Team.
You shouldn’t have
No, that would be Dwayne Haskins, who got himself stripped of his captaincy and fined $40,000 for attending a birthday party without a mask on.
To Haskins’ credit, though, at least he didn’t lean in when they blew out the candles.
Past, future, present
Speaking of Christmas, the big man in red looks poised to deliver yet another belated holiday gift for Chiefs fans.
But enough about Andy Reid.
Since Donald Trump is suddenly parsing out pardons like Halloween candy, why not ones for Steve Bartman — and The Butt Fumble too?
The 0-13 Jets stunned the Rams in Week 15 but likely fumbled away their shot at the No. 1 draft pick — Clemson QB Trevor Lawrence — in the process.
That’s so Jets: They even lose when they win.
Uh, oh. Baseball’s over-the-top stat craze is spreading to basketball.
The world just learned that Memphis’ Ja Morant’s 44 points against the Spurs on Wednesday marked the second-highest point total ever in a second-year player’s season opener.
Left unsaid: by a right-hander, at home, on hardwood, in a night game.
Talking the talk
• ESPN broadcaster Dave Pasch, to NBCsports.com, on calling college-football games remotely from home because of COVID-19 restrictions: “At least I don’t have to wait in line for the bathroom at halftime.”
• Gary Bachman, via Facebook, after Anthony Davis spent part of the Lakers’ final preseason game trimming his toenails on the bench: “Perhaps he should be traded to the Clippers.”
Now that’s service
White Sox manager Tony La Russa plea-bargained his DUI charges down to reckless driving and was sentenced to one day of home detention, a $1,400 fine and 20 hours of community service.
Not televising six games against the Tigers should take care of the latter.
• Kent Somers of the Arizona Republic, via Twitter, on critics who say the Cardinals’ DeAndre Hopkins sits out too many practices: “A WR who gets 1,300 yards and 10 TDs a year could show up to my practice with a lounge chair and a pitcher of pina coladas.”
• Rich Eisen of the NFL Network, via Twitter, after well-worn veterans Dez Bryant, Antonio Brown, Frank Gore, Larry Fitzgerald and Le’Veon Bell all scored touchdowns in Week 15: “And so my 2016 fantasy football team had an absolutely huge day.”
• Janice Hough of LeftCoastSportsBabe.com, on the CFP semifinal scheduled for the Rose Bowl being moved to AT&T Stadium in Arlington, Texas, to avoid COVID restrictions: “So can we just call it the Yellow Rose of Texas Bowl?”
• Blogger Chad Picasner, on reports the Yankees and DJ LeMahieu might be $25 million apart in contract negotiations: “That sounds like a lot, but let’s wait until Hal Steinbrenner gets back from lunch with his credit card.”
Playing .200 ball
South Carolina — which somehow landed a bid to the Union Home Mortgage Gasparilla Bowl with a 2-8 record — had to pull out because of COVID-19 issues.
Thus robbing the world of hearing USC cheerleaders urging their team to “hold that Mendoza line!”
Quote, end quote
• Phil Mushnick of the New York Post, after the Browns nominated Myles Garrett — suspended six games last season for ripping off an opponent’s helmet and bonking him on the head with it — for this year’s Walter Payton NFL Man of the Year Award: “Wonder who finished second.”
• Bob Molinaro in the Norfolk Virginian-Pilot, after a Steph Curry rookie card sold at auction for $611,000: “So now we have a better understanding for why the very rich need those tax breaks.”
• Jerry Rice, via Instagram, after listing his and Randy Moss’ NFL accomplishments side by side to rebut Moss proclaiming himself the greatest receiver of all time: “You just got MOSSED.”
• Cardinals RB Kenyan Drake, via Twitter: “I’m glad fantasy football don’t pay my bills.”
• QB Patrick Mahomes, to reporters, after the Chiefs clinched the AFC West title with a win at Miami’s Hard Rock Stadium — the same place they won the Super Bowl 10½ months earlier: “It seems like every time we leave this stadium, we have a hat of some type.”