My surreal medical bill of, technically, $95,487

How much does a two-night hospital stay in Washington really cost?

A couple of months ago, I developed chest pains and was flown from Bainbridge Island to Harborview Medical Center in Seattle. I spent two nights at the hospital, was tested for possible heart attack or stroke, and my insurance company, Kaiser Permanente, was billed $95,487 for transportation, tests, medication, and a “semiprivate room.”

However, Kaiser covered $17,346.74 and I paid $550. Why was there such a huge discrepancy between the charges and the actual money paid?

When I became sick, my wife called 911 and an ambulance took me on a 5-to-10-minute ride to the helicopter landing pad. Kaiser was charged $5,966.20 for that ambulance transport but paid only $822.97.

While being flown from Bainbridge to Harborview, I worried about the transportation cost. Could this flight be as much as $1,000? Will Kaiser pay for this deluxe transportation service?

The bill for this short helicopter ride was a bit more than the $1,000 I expected: I was billed $40,986. Then, my insurance was billed $34,932.50 and ultimately paid $4,516.22 — about 12% of the asking price.

I went through various brain and heart tests, including a very painful chemical stress test. No problems were found, and I pleaded to be released. I missed a peaceful night of sleep, curled up with my cat. I felt good, had no chest pains and I walked the hallways of the Norm Maleng Building for exercise and enjoyed the art displays.

The reason that I did not get much sleep in my $6,350.39 “semiprivate room” was that my roommate was rather restless and had the nurses coming and going much of both nights. I was billed an additional emergency room service cost of $2,639.50 per night. The total room charges billed to Kaiser were $6,350.39 per night. Was my roommate’s insurance company also charged $6,350.39?

Unfortunately, most of the tests the doctors considered necessary ran also into the thousands of dollars. The bill for the CT scan, for instance, was $19,422.98. The 30-minute chemical stress test, which I thought would surely kill me, was billed at $8,210.70. The charge for an EEG was $1,434.94.

The pharmacy service charges were $2,457.45. At home, I take four prescription pills every day at a cost of about $3. Since pharmacy services were not itemized, but lab work and various tests were itemized, I am curious to know what exactly Kaiser paid for. To be fair, non-pharmacy charges may have been added. But $2,457.45 for pharmacy services?

 I fondly remember the night I spent with food poisoning in a Brussels hospital and it did not cost me a single euro.

So, what exactly is the real cost of everything a patient is charged for? Does heart imaging really cost $5,345.95? Do all hospitals charge about $1,794.04 for an MRI and do all insurance companies pay about only 15%?

Despite this surrealistic relationship between services billed and actual money paid, I thank the working staff at Harborview for their care. During my two-night, three-day stay, all the doctors and nurses were nothing but helpful and showed concern with my mental and physical well-being. I am fortunate to be insured, and I am very thankful that just about everything we consumers buy has a fixed price.