If you’re heading to watch the playoffs at T-Mobile Park — and no one should be going through this alone — you’re definitely going to want a lot of beer and/or snacks. Not saying anything that might hex our newly heroic Mariners, but as fans, our past sorrows have left us with much to drown, beer-wise, in the form of performance-anxiety-by-proxy in the extreme. It has been pointed out that the playoff drought itself — may it be burning in hell — was old enough to drink this year, so those of us biting our nails into the postseason certainly deserve to. And who’s to blame any of us for worry-eating a hot dog and some Red Vines?

In scary/hopeful/my-oh-my sports times, food counts — and drinks definitely do, too. Regular stadium prices, however, are not conducive to the level of comfort we seek — at most T-Mobile Park concession stands, we’re talking $8 dogs and $11 beers (and up!). But Mariners management wisely introduced a lineup of cheap food items and added more bargain-priced-for-the-ballpark beers/hard seltzers for 2022 (the year that we at last again cheered the team on to the playoffs … coincidence?!). 

If you’re heading to T-Mobile Park for an attempt at remote mass mind-control of certain happenings in Canada, here’s exactly where to find $6-$7 Value Beverages, which include Georgetown Bohdi, Modelo Especial, Reuben’s Crikey IPA, Truly Wild Berry and eight more selections:

  • Section 116 — Batch Cart
  • Section 132 — The Natural
  • Section 136 — Good Hops Hall of Fame Bar
  • Section 141 — Batch Cart
  • Section 149 — Coke Deck
  • Section 183 — AM/PM
  • Section 195 — Beer Coolers
  • Section 221 — Change Up
  • Section 243 — Mac N Cheese
  • Hit it Here — Outside Bar
  • Section 319 — Good Hops
  • Section 329 — Sodo Sipping Container
  • Section 330 — Good Hops
  • Section 340 — Nacho

For a cheap snack, it’s the Postseason Pack: a smallish-but-serviceable Junior Mariner Dog, Red Vines and a fountain pop with free refills for $10, available at all Rolling Roof concession locations throughout the ballpark — specifically in sections 109, 118, 141, 190, 222, 244, 309, 319, 329 and 347.

And if you want to spring for something more, well, real in the comestibles department, here are my reviews of seven new T-Mobile Park food options for this miracle of a season — from Seattle’s beloved Marination (recommended!) to David Chang’s phoned-in-from-very-far-away Fuku (very much not recommended!).

In closing: GO M’S PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!!!