“I’ve made my intentions clear … If you’re not here for an engagement, get the (bleep) out.”
And so it was on the second episode of the new season of ABC’s “The Bachelorette” that a shaking, shaken Katie Thurston evoked one of the most sacred and important requirements of all of the franchise’s many shows — that each suitor “be here for the right reasons.” As the Renton native explained, the “right” reasons are to find love. The “wrong reasons,” she said, would be using her and her heart as “a platform” to gain wider fame.
Let’s be honest: You can’t swing a rose without hitting an aspiring model, actor or rock star on this show. But Katie made it clear she wasn’t messing around. She sent San Diego’s Cody Menk packing after his shirtless cowboy mud-wrestling match with fellow San Diegoan Aaron Clancy revealed some secret hometown beef that was hinted at last week. We still don’t know exactly what that is, and frankly, it’s annoying. But Aaron implied that Cody was — you guessed it — here for the wrong reasons. Bye Cody!
Also possibly on the chopping block: handsome new front-runner Thomas Jacobs, who looks like either a Disney prince or that one guy from any boy band whose name you always forget. Even after Thomas got a rose, irritating instigator Karl Smith pulled Katie aside completely out of concern (wink, wink) and told her someone else in the house is here for the wrong reasons. “I’m not here to put anyone on blast!” he insisted, while putting every single person in the room on blast. Katie tearfully laid down the law and left the room without giving out any more roses, but the previews imply that the chief Wrong Reason dude is none other than Thomas, who might be trying to be the next “Bachelor”!! (Dun-dun-DUNNNNN!)
In other rose-related news:
- This week’s biggest Bachelor Nation happening took place off-screen when longtime host Chris Harrison, who “stepped away” from the franchise after some controversial, racially insensitive statements, has now stepped away for good, with a reported 8-figure parting gift. That doesn’t affect the outcome of this season, but it calls for delicious speculation as to who will follow Katie’s hosts/tour guides/fashionable Greek chorus Tayshia Adams and Kaitlyn Bristowe next time.
- Katie’s highly touted sex positivity inspired a very racy group date during which the suitors creatively described why they’d be the perfect lover. The surprise rose recipient? Sweet former baseball player and virgin Mike Planeta, who revealed his sexual status to Katie, the other guys and the world by reading a letter addressed to his future wife whom he’s saving himself for. It could have been cringeworthy but Mike handled it well. We don’t see him lasting too long on a show that once had a near-naked bungee-jumping date. But he got a rose this one time. That’s nice for him.