There are many words that come to mind when you think of “The Bachelorette”: “hot tub,” “rose” and blatant overuse of the word “bro.” “Dignity?” Nah.
Yet a sense of dignity and self-respect was behind not one, but two departures on the most recent episode starring Renton’s Katie Thurston. First was Brendan Scanzano, handsome in a Hallmark movie ex-boyfriend kind of way, who chose to leave the show when Katie didn’t grant him a one-on-one date. And honestly, Brendan got so little screen time up to now that fans have admitted to forgetting who he was. As he sagely noted, we’re getting close to the end of the season, and it’s hard to propose to someone you’ve only been on group dates with. Respect, my dude.
The second guy to leave with his head held high was Andrew Spencer, who didn’t get a rose but got what felt like the closest thing to a real breakup this show has seen in a while. Katie walked him out tearfully, telling him he was too great to have her potentially meet his mom and sister knowing she had stronger feelings for other guys. He cried. She cried. He came back the next day for some closure and with a note saying that he was around if she ever changed her mind. Wah.
But! When Katie ran after him and jumped into his arms, asking him if he’d stay around a little longer if possible, Andrew turned her down! PLOT TWIST! As he said, Katie chose not to give him a rose, and “I want my future wife to choose me.” (Sniff.) Who can blame him?
Here’s what else happened on Monday night’s episode:
Bringing you home to meet my mom (or not): Pre-pandemic, the so-called “hometown dates” were just that — the Bachelorette would travel cross-country to meet the parents and families of her last remaining suitors. But this year, as in the last couple of seasons, the families will come to Katie at New Mexico’s Hyatt Regency Tamaya Resort and Spa. While we kind of miss, like, visiting the suitors’ high schools or hanging out in a random bar as they’re grilled by friends, we still get those awkward conversations where everyone tries to pretend she’s not about to go meet the folks of the other guys she’s dating.
Cuddle and cry: Katie, who is known for her sex positivity to the point where Monday’s group date featured an artist who displayed floral self-portraits of her … um … lady parts, admitted that it was unusual for her to be dating a virgin, like sweet Mike Planeta. But she was game to test their chemistry on a date that consisted of cuddling in several different positions. It may have been hotter if Mike didn’t keep talking about his mom. Yeah, don’t do that.
Wild flailing guesses: With Mike, Andrew and Brendan gone, the remaining guys are floppy-haired Greg Grippo, human meme Justin Glaze, widowed dad Michael Allilo and returning suitor Blake Moynes. Of the four, we think Greg’s the guy to beat, what with all of the sparks between him and Katie, and all the other guys seem threatened by him. Then again, when has this show made sense?