Hank Williams, Johnny Cash, Merle Haggard … John Daly?
Golf’s one-man soap opera has cut a country song called “Hit It Hard” that draws from his Tour roots, crooning “No laying up, no holding back, ain’t afraid of nothing, it’s a natural fact.”
“Stay away from golf references,” advised Adam Hill of the Las Vegas Review-Journal. “Your real life is more of a country song than anything you’ve done on the course.”
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• At SportsPickle.com: “Struggling Manchester United announces it will finish out its career in the MLS.”
• At Fark.com: “The Philadelphia 76ers got, and are expected to drop, Thabeet.”
Drafting a lesson plan
Mark Waller, the NFL’s chief marketing officer, says elementary-school teachers could get students hooked on math if they simply incorporated fantasy football into the curriculum.
Well, that’s one way to truly prepare students for the real-life workforce.
One audible too many
The NFL fined Broncos QB Peyton Manning for taunting Texans safety D.J. Swearinger.
Or as Manning tried to downplay the incident, an Omaha beef.
Pass the popcorn
“The November Man” is a new movie about:
a) the CIA keeping a retired agent under surveillance;
b) a Chicago Cub getting a head start on spring training.
He has a football Jones
According to ESPN, Vikings star Adrian Peterson told Cowboys owner Jerry Jones he’d like to play in Big D when his contract in Minnesota is up.
Apparently, Peterson feels guilty that Dallas got fleeced so badly in the Herschel Walker trade.
Latest ESPN exclusive: Secretariat didn’t like getting washed down alongside his fellow horses, either.
Talking the talk
• Frank Schwab of Yahoo.com, after Peyton Manning called his $8,258 fine for taunting “money well spent”: “Might be the best quote after a fine in league history (in the non-Randy Moss Division, anyway).”
• ABC’s Jimmy Kimmel, on global warming: “We need to give the Earth the ice-bucket challenge.”
Suspended Jets cornerback Dimitri Patterson denied he was AWOL during the team’s exhibition game last Friday, but refused to reveal what he was actually doing.
Though we can safely rule out diving off a balcony to save his drowning nephew.
Dwight Perry: 206-464-8250 or email@example.com