And you wonder why opposing defenses can’t decipher Peyton Manning?
“Omaha is a run play,” explained the Broncos QB of the term he used 44 times while barking out signals in a playoff win over the Chargers, “but it could be a pass play or a play-action pass, depending on a couple things: when, which way we’re going, the quarter and the jerseys that we’re wearing.
“So it varies, really, play to play. So, that’s — there’s your answer to that one.”
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All righty, then.
• At Fark.com: “This just in from the Adding Insult to Injury Department: Auburn coach wins Paul ‘Bear’ Bryant Award.”
• At TheOnion.com: “Unemployed Detroit resident dismayed to learn job opening is with the Lions.”
Surefire way to determine if someone is over 50 years old: Tell them you just saw a clip of The Professor reminiscing about Lovie, and see if they guess “Gilligan’s Island” or “SportsCenter.”
All Or Nothing Dept.
The Houston Rockets scored 73 points in the first half — and then just 19 in the second — in a 104-92 loss to Oklahoma City last week.
Bet Kevin McHale never uses that halftime speech again.
First lady Michelle Obama turned 50 on Friday, and hardcore Seahawks fans rejoiced.
That she’s no longer a 49er.
From Bob Chavez of the Rochester (N.Y.) Democrat & Chronicle: “Jerry Jones and Tony Romo walk into a bar …
“… to watch the playoffs.”
CSI: The Bronx
“A-Rod is dead right that baseball was out to get him,” wrote Gene Collier of the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, “much in the way that cops are out to get robbers.”
• Retired O-lineman Mark Schlereth, to Seattle’s ESPN Radio 710, on excessive player celebrations: “Can you imagine if every time an offensive lineman blocked somebody, he took 12 seconds to dance about it? The game would last 7½ hours.”
• Blogger TC Chong, on why Manning uses “Omaha” in his signal-calling: “Because the league would not allow him to use ‘Papa Johns.’ ”
• Brad Dickson, of the Omaha (Neb.) World-Herald, on WWE launching its own rassling network: “It’ll be sort of like the Longhorn Network, only with less boasting.”
• Steve Schrader of the Detroit Free Press, on Nationals outfielder Bryce Harper saying the issue of his offseason weight gain is overblown: “OK, but sabermetricians are still concerned about his WAPF (Weight Above Prince Fielder).”
Too bad Major League Baseball didn’t come up with instant-replay challenges 30 years ago.
The thought of Billy Martin kicking dirt on the wheels of a camera tripod? Priceless.
Dwight Perry: 206-464-8250 or email@example.com