Sideline Chatter

Here’s guessing that Jillert Anema hasn’t been wearing a Seahawks 12th Man jersey around Sochi.

“You have a lot of attention for foolish sport, like American football,” the Dutch speedskating coach told CNBC. “You waste a lot of talent, athletic talent, in a sport where it’s meant to kill each other, to injure each other. … You waste a lot of good talent in a sport that sucks.”

Missed it by a hair

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Oakland A’s pitcher Drew Pomeranz missed the Oakland A’s first spring-training workout because of an ingrown leg hair.

So who tended to that one, the team trainer or the head groundskeeper?

Uneasy on the eyes

“I just awoke from the mother of all psychedelic nightmares,” wrote RJ Currie of “Don Cherry was wearing Norwegian curling pants.”

Decisions, decisions

LeBron James broke his nose Thursday night, and the Heat says his availability for Sunday against the Bulls will be a game-time decision.

ESPN, taking no chances, immediately booked Jim Gray for a possible one-hour pregame show.

Driving up the odds

Dale Earnhardt Jr. is the 10-1 Daytona 500 favorite, according to RJ Bell of, with six other drivers next up at 12-1.

As for Danica Patrick winning with Richard Petty serving as her backseat driver? Off the board.

Driving up the odds

Police in Dallas had a six-hour standoff with what turned out to be an empty appartment.

Or the law-enforcement equivalent of a foreign-policy debate with Dennis Rodman.

Uneasy on the ice

“I wouldn’t say it was slick early Monday in Omaha,” wrote Brad Dickson of the Omaha (Neb.) World-Herald, “but while walking across my driveway I qualified for the finals of Winter Olympic ice dancing.”

Talko time

• TBS’s Conan O’Brien, after Adelina Sotnikova’s gold-medal performance in Sochi: “The Russian skater said she was inspired by her family, her coaches and what happened to the losing — and now missing — Russian men’s hockey team.”

• Headline at “Johnny Manziel blows an impressive 0.20 on the NFL combine breathalyzer test.”

• Spotted on a Chicago billboard, before the U.S.-Canada men’s hockey semifinal: “Loser keeps Bieber.”, on reports that Yankee shortstop Derek Jeter and model girlfriend Hannah Davis have reconciled: “Apparently he’s batted around and is back to the top of the order.”

He’s typecast

Southern Miss says it will list incoming football recruit Picasso Nelson as a defensive back.

In other words, they’ve already painted him into a corner.

Dwight Perry: 206-464-8250 or