Just call him The Dave Kingman of golf.
Wales’ Stuart Manley hit a home run — OK, a hole-in-one — on the par-3 third hole during the third round of the World Cup of Golf in Melbourne, Australia, then struck out with a septuple-bogey on the next hole. Adding to his misery, he “lost” the Mercedes he thought he’d just won for the ace because the contest was for the final round only.
“It’s the highest high and then the lowest low I’ve ever experienced on a golf course,” the world’s 346th-ranked player told PGAtour.com. “I thought the car was mine, and with the crowd, all the hype, I was just buzzing. … Then I found out about the car, and go and have an 11.
“I kept asking my caddie, ‘How many shots is that now?’ I actually thought it was a 10 but I was not going to argue, because my head was pretty fried at that point, to be honest.”
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Cardinal RB Andre Ellington got some of his dreadlocks yanked out when the Jaguars’ Jason Babin took him down by the hair.
Tackled for a loss? No kidding.
From Steve Schrader of the Detroit Free Press: “Why did Alex Rodriguez leave his grievance hearing?
“a) He was furious that Bud Selig wasn’t there.
“b) ‘Strike that from the record!’ the arbitrator said, so he figured he was out.
“c) He was pulling the old hidden-agenda trick.
“d) Urban Meyer told him it was a flawed system.
“e) Hey, a walkoff hearing is one of the most exciting plays in baseball.”
Dragging it out
“A note to those of you who don’t believe in Purgatory,” wrote RJ Currie of SportsDeke.com. “Try watching the last three minutes of an NBA game.”
• Packers receiver Jordy Nelson, to ESPN.com, when asked if injured QB Aaron Rodgers would return to play on Thanksgiving: “I would be surprised. There’s nothing wrong with being surprised, though.”
• Maureen Dowd of The New York Times, on the suddenly woebegone Redskins: “RG3-and-8.”
• Greg Cote of the Miami Herald, on Dennis Rodman’s new line of signature vodka: “One shot and you want a nose ring. Two shots and you’re flying to North Korea.”
A celebratory balloon released during a Nebraska football game eventually landed in Ludington State Park in Michigan — 565 miles away.
Alert statisticians immediately declared it the longest touchdown in Husker history.
Dwight Perry: 206-464-8250 or firstname.lastname@example.org