Last week's rankings in parentheses Team 1 Braves (2) To complement Uggla, Upton and Upton, need to trade for "Yu" Darvish 2 A's (4) Looks...

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Last week’s rankings in parentheses

1 Braves (2) To complement Uggla, Upton and Upton, need to trade for “Yu” Darvish
2 A’s (4) Looks like the Oakland A’s of 2013 are going to be the Oakland A’s
3 Red Sox (16) Until further notice, Red Sox are America’s team
4 Giants (1) Giants have longest sellout streak in majors, if you don’t count Jeffrey Loria
5 Rockies (18) Two games snowed out; like Peyton Manning, Rockies can’t play in the cold
6 Yankees (19) Are they better than even Marv Albert or their network thought? YES!
7 Tigers (6) Miguel Cabrera turned 30 Thursday, Leyland celebrated with 30 Marlboros
8 Cardinals (8) Wainwright first pitcher this year with strikeout in every inning of complete game
9 Rangers (5) Interpreter can go to mound, but Rangers wish he’d stop making pitching changes
10 Nationals (3) Davey suffers 1,000th career loss; it only seems like they’re all against Braves
11 Orioles (9) Still the best team in baseball from the 10th inning on
12 Reds (7) Where’s Elmer Dessens when you really need him?
13 Diamondbacks (13) Miguel hitting .222, but for a catcher named Montero, that’s like .400
14 Royals (11) Finally have pitching squared away; now they can’t hit home runs
15 Dodgers (10) A.J. Ellis needs work on throws to 2nd, blocking plate, and restraining irate hitters
16 Mets (20) Mets have been desperate for a young star, and they have one: Matt Harvey
17 Blue Jays (14) Rarely has more preseason hype blown up so quickly
18 Rays (12) Rays are winless in David Price’s first four starts. Cy, Schmy
19 Angels (15) Flailing Angels desperately need Mike Trout to become super-human again
20 Pirates (24) Still figuring out who will replace Bedard’s five-inning starts after midseason injury
21 Twins (22) In a moving tribute to Hank Aaron, rookie outfielder Aaron Hicks is hitting .044
22 White Sox (17) White Sox edge ahead of Joey Votto in walks, 25-22
23 Brewers (25) Brews sign Francisco Rodriguez, who’s not as sharp as before. Now called HR-Rod
24 Phillies (21) Reports of Roy Halladay’s demise are premature, it turns out
25 Mariners (26) Good news: Mariners still have chance to win CONCACAF Gold Cup
26 Indians (23) Players allowed paternity leave, but fun-loving Swisher goes on fraternity leave
27 Padres (29) Carlos Quentin will wear a suit of armor during his next game against Dodgers
28 Cubs (37) After watching this team, rooftop operators demand MORE obstruction of view
29 Astros (28) Can’t wait to see the movie documenting Astros’ win total: “43”
30 Marlins (30) Marlins tongue-twister: She sells Cishek by the seashore
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