See how much you know about the loopier side of this year's state political campaigns.
To steal from Tina Fey, sometimes it feels like just living through this election has made us all a little dumber.
But let’s check to make sure. Below, test your knowledge in our annual quiz of the oddities, banalities and downright criminalities that made up the year that was in local politics.
1. Fill in the blank. Democratic gubernatorial candidate Jay Inslee is fond of saying he “raised three _____ boys in the apple orchards” near Yakima. What adjective did he use to appeal to Eastern Washingtonians?
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d) sub minimum wage
2. What was Republican gubernatorial candidate Rob McKenna doing when he said, “Go get a job!”
a) Unveiling his jobs plan
b) Trying to flee from a Democratic protester
c) Giving career advice to Inslee, who had just quit Congress
3. What is “King and King?”
a) The likely power-sharing arrangement between McKenna and Democratic House Speaker Frank Chopp, if both are elected
b) A state-approved marijuana brand, should pot-legalization I-502 be approved
c) A book, about two princes marrying, that gay-marriage opponents say will be forced on schools if Referendum 74 passes
4. How much of the $1.4 million raised by Tim Eyman’s “Voters Want More Choices” group, to put a tax-limiting initiative on the ballot, was donated by voters?
a) About all of it; otherwise he wouldn’t call the group that.
b) Three percent. The other 97 percent came from oil, beer and other corporate interests.
5. About whom was it said that “sunny climes are for shady people?”
a) Rob McKenna, who took an official junket to Disneyland
b) Democratic state-auditor candidate Troy Kelley, who transferred millions to an account in Belize during a legal battle
c) Mitt Romney, who seems supernaturally tanned
6. What was Democratic state House candidate Amy Biviano, of Spokane Valley, referring to when she said, “I wanted to show that we’re not asexual man-haters?”
a) Why she, a feminist, had posed topless for Playboy
b) Why she, a Democrat, sent valentines to local Republicans
c) Why she, a woman, included Viagra in a contraceptive-health-care proposal
7. About which campaign was the voters’ choice described as: “What’s worse, a woman going topless 15 or 20 years ago or a guy pulling a gun on somebody?”
a) Suzan DelBene vs. John Koster
b) Maria Cantwell vs. Michael Baumgartner
c) Biviano vs. Rep. Matt Shea, R-Spokane Valley (Let’s face it, Westsiders, politics was just spicier east of the mountains this year.)
Match these deeds to the political players listed below:
8. Wrote a self-published novel described on Amazon as “an exercise in self-adoration”
9. Sponsored a resolution lauding Rush Limbaugh for his “animal magnetism and huggable charm”
10. Got national visibility for his campaign when he told a Seattle reporter to “go f — yourself”
11. Used to do undercover interviews advocating pot legalization posing as a “responsible businessman named Jerry”
12. Said that “all gay men were once Catholic women” and made other offensive comments, causing Democrats to return thousands in donations
13. Was college roommates with the Hollywood producer of “Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader?”
a) Ramtha channeler JZ Knight
b) Republican senate candidate Michael Baumgartner
c) Democratic congressional candidate Denny Heck
d) Republican congressional candidate John Koster
e) Republican attorney-general candidate Reagan Dunn
f) Travel writer Rick Steves
14. To what was Reagan Dunn referring when he recalled “an exciting thing for a 17-year-old in a muscle car?”
a) Driving in a parade for Ronald Reagan
b) Meeting Amy Biviano
c) Doing doughnuts in the snow in his Camaro, for which he got charged with reckless driving
15. Last March I wrote a column blasting Jay Inslee for quitting Congress eight months early, and especially for his claim that Congress was so gridlocked it wouldn’t accomplish anything when he was gone anyway. So what happened?
a) Congress took a series of momentous votes, working overtime to approve vital legislation for the benefit of the nation.
b) Inslee was right.
Answers: 1) c. 2) b. 3) c. 4) b. 5) b. 6) a. 7) c. 8) c. 9) d. 10) b. 11) f. 12) a. 13) e. 14) c. 15) b.
Danny Westneat’s column appears Wednesday and Sunday. Reach him at 206-464-2086 or firstname.lastname@example.org.