Blog war is hell. Or maybe it's just funny as hell. Here's how one of the oddest online kerfuffles played out this past summer: In this...

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Blog war is hell. Or maybe it’s just funny as hell. Here’s how one of the oddest online kerfuffles played out this past summer:

In this corner, Andrew Wright, Brooklyn-based comedian. And in this corner, Andrew Wright, contemporary artist in Ontario, Canada.

Here’s the situation: When Andrew Wright the comedian Googled his name, he was shocked to discover that the top result was not he, but Andrew Wright the artist. And for Andrew Wright the comedian, that would not do.

“I’m back in the blogging game,” he announced on his blog, His goal: “Knocking Andrew Wright, contemporary artist from Canada, off of his high and mighty Google perch … Oh, how I bet Andrew Wright, contemporary artist from Canada, just sits back and gloats over his vaunted search-engine ranking.”

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And so on, and so on, repeating the phase “contemporary artist from Canada” (along with other, racier phrases the likes of which are typically frowned on in professional settings) in an effort to peel Internet traffic away from Andrew Wright the artist.

The artist responded on a new blog, called “It really is quite sad. Andrew Wright … has actually tried to adopt my identity … I am left to conclude that he is quite mediocre.”

Shot back the comedian: “This interweb thingy ain’t big enough for the both of us.” Then he accused Andrew Wright the artist of provoking the entire battle.

The artist pressed on, describing the fight as being not just about “championing good art versus mediocre comedy,” but also nothing less than truth, justice and the Canadian way. “He’s not even funny!” the artist proclaimed.

The comedian then beckoned “foot soldiers of the revolution,” to his Web-traffic cause, requesting that they click on his link, and not others, “especially ones owned by a certain other Andrew Wright, contemporary artist from Canada, who shall remain nameless …

“I will be the most Googled Andrew Wright on the Internet, even if it means forcibly taking all of a certain contemporary artist from Canada’s search traffic for my own. This I swear to you.”

Finally, Andrew Wright the artist lamented the depths to which the spat had fallen before turning a deaf ear to further goading from Andrew Wright the comedian, who crowed despite his victory in the search-engine war.

“I am shutting my ears to your silence,” bellowed Andrew Wright the comedian. “Mark my words, I will hear none of it.”

Marc Ramirez: 206-464-8102 or

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